You Are Valuable

By: Jason Marcle

As I have mentioned in previous blog posts, I do not have
much self-confidence in myself. I honestly never have. This plays a small role in
my anxiety and depression issues. Sometimes when I am feeling down, I think
that I am not worth very much. I am not a man that has many friends, people
never invite me to outings or weekend get togethers, I have always wanted to be
invited to a cool Halloween party that I hear many speak about. I never was invited to the “cool” parties in high school. I always felt left out. I can go on and
on with examples.

When I get into this mindset I have to pause and meditate
hard on why I am feeling the way I currently do. In reality, I have a friend
that sends me an inspirational text message every single day. Do you know how
good that makes me feel? This individual thinks enough of me to take time out
of his busy morning to type out an inspirational message. That sounds like a
good friend to me. I have another friend that will call me at least three times
a week to check on me and see how things are going.

When I am a depression mindset, I am blind to these friends. Sure,
I acknowledge them and speak to them but, what I mean is, I do not think about
how lucky I am. All I can see is the negative no matter how many positives are
in front of me. It is like a disease. I cannot help it. It is just how I felt
at the time. I do not think about how lucky I am to have a beautiful faithful
wife of twenty-three years. I do not think about how lucky I am to have such a
beautiful, respectful daughter that cares for me.

Maybe you are not the one that has low self-esteem. Maybe one
of your friends or loved one’s struggle with this. You may ask how to manage
someone when they are in this mindset of not feeling valuable. If that is the
case, treat them with kindness. Do not try to tell them how valuable they are
to you, show them. Maybe remind them how much fun you have when you are with
them. If you start talking about them being in a depression mindset, the
individual processes that as another negative thought. “Here is something else
I do wrong. Nobody ever has any fun when I am around.”  These are a couple of common thoughts that
race through my mind when someone is telling me how sad or depressed, I am acting.
It is hard to explain how I cannot just turn it off like a light switch. Eventually,
after I soak in some positive thoughts, things lighten up and get better. One
of the worst things you can do is talk about something negative to someone that
is already in a negative mindset.

Someone that is feeling depression, may feel very alone. That
is how I feel a lot. Now that I have lost my best friend and both parents, I
have what seems like a large void inside me. I have read a lot of grief books
that tell me that it is ok to feel that void. This morning my friend sent me a
excerpt from AA’s book titled “Daily Reflections.”  It says:

“Overcoming Loneliness

Almost without exception, alcoholics are tortured by
loneliness. Even before our drinking got bad and people began to cut us off,
nearly all of us suffered the feeling that we did not quite belong.

As Bill Sees It, p.90

It is only when I am alone and calm that I am able to
communicate with God, for He cannot reach me when I am in turmoil. It is good
to maintain contact with God at all times, but it is absolutely essential that,
when everything seems to go wrong, I maintain that contact through prayer and
meditation.”

So, when I feel alone, I am not. God is there. I can talk to
him, I can pray to him, I can meditate on him. When I read that excerpt, it
reminds me that I am not the only one who feels alone. I am not the only one
that feels like they do not belong. The reason I do not like being alone is
because that is when negative thoughts start racing through my head unless I
get out my laptop or journal and start writing.

When I start feeling lonely and the negative thoughts race
into my head, I then feel like I am worthless. These verses came to my
attention when thinking about my self-worth.

 Luke 12:24 ESV says:

 “Consider the
ravens: they neither sow nor reap, they have neither storehouse nor barn, and
yet God feeds them. Of how much more value are you than the birds!”

Matthew 6:26-27 ESV says:

“Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor
gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not more
value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his
span of life?”

Matthew 10:31ESV says:

“Fear Not, therefore; you are of more value than many
sparrows.”

Those three verses show how God takes care of the birds. He
takes care of all of his creations. These verses show me how God values me. It
also reminds me that by being worried and anxious all the time will get me
nothing. It will not even add a single hour to my life. These few verses alone explain
that my life is valuable. I am important and so are you. God has a plan for
each and every one of us. We are here for a reason. We should not just “exist.”
 We are all precious and valuable in
God’s eyes.

Remember that we never know what our neighbor, friend, co-worker,
or enemy is currently going through. We cannot peak into their minds. Please be
mindful of how you react and respond to those around you that seem to be down.
Please do not add to their negative thoughts. Lift them up with positive thoughts
and environments.