Peace Within

By: Jason Marcle

Has anybody ever done you or somebody you love wrong? Now, let us flip that question around. Have you ever done somebody wrong in your lifetime? When somebody does you wrong, how do you respond? Do you get angry or resentful, or are you forgiving and understanding? If you have done somebody wrong, how did you expect them to react? These are all questions we should be asking ourselves if we do not want anyone living rent free in our minds. If I sit down and think hard enough, I can remember many times where I felt like someone did me or a family member wrong. If I think even harder, I can remember many times where I did somebody else wrong. The first thing that comes to my mind is the guy that was involved in the accident that killed Alyssa.  I have mentioned him several times in other blogs. Not only did he lie, but he also turned around and sued Alyssa’s family. This man’s wife is our first cousin and he still sued. Could you easily forget that? Could you even easily forgive a family member that sued you for an accident that killed your child? I can remember when Amy was in the initial stages of her eating disorder and her
attitude was changing swiftly. She had not seemed like herself in quite some
time. I questioned her over and over about what was going on. We had just had a
daughter, and everybody had their attention focused on Haley. One evening Amy
was putting up laundry in the bedroom and I asked her again what was going on. I
then asked her if she was on drugs or something because she was not acting like
herself. She then abruptly told me “No I am not on drugs. I cannot believe you
would say something like that. If you must know, I am quite sure that I have an
eating disorder.”  This came out of left field for me. Without thinking, I responded with “I think you are just looking for some attention.”  I was young, I did
not understand, but that does not mean I should have responded that way. This
made Amy terribly upset, and I am not sure if she ever forgave me for responding like that or not. Being that she does not bring it up, or use it against
me today, I believe she probably has. This is an example of where I have done
somebody wrong.Amy had been lying to me about giving her insulin and keeping her blood sugars under control. She was lying to me about why she was throwing up more often. She was lying to me about taking diet pills. She was lying to me about a lot of things. Our relationship was heavily strained. This played a big part in her attitude
change. That does not make my response to her right. That does not mean that I
can hold that over her head today and never forgive her. I had to forgive her
if I wanted to help her get better. I had to forgive her if I ever wanted our
relationship back. I can go on and on about times in my past where I feel like I was wronged by somebody. But it is only fair to remember that I have wronged others as well. I will never have peace in my life if I continue to live in the past. I cannot change the
past. I cannot change the outcome of the accident that killed Alyssa. I also cannot
have peace if I am constantly thinking about things I have done wrong in the
past. Nobody is perfect. We all mess up from time to time. In God’s eyes, we
are all sinners. The bible tells us many times about forgiving and judging
others. Ephesians 4:32 says, Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in
Christ forgave you.Matthew 6:14 says, For if you forgive others their trespasses,
your heavenly Father will also forgive you.Colossians 3:13 says, Bearing with one another and, if one has a
complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you,
so you also must forgive.Luke 6:37 says, Judge not, and you will not be judged; condemn not, and you will not be
condemned; forgive, and you will be forgiven.I know several people today that seem to carry a chip on
their shoulder. They remember everything negative but nothing positive. They can mention stuff that happened years ago even though they have supposedly forgiven the person for whatever the situation was. I know people that will quickly have something negative to say about anyone you bring up. Even though the incidents may have happened years ago. We cannot live peaceful lives if we are focusing on the
negatives of our past. Amy could easily mention my drinking problem daily even though I have corrected it. I could still mention her eating disorder even though she has corrected it. God did not intend for us to live our lives in the past. We need to live our lives for today and cherish the new positive memories. When I think of the past long enough, I will get angry and resentful. I will have the attitude of wishing harm on certain people. I cannot live that way and expect to have a peaceful life. I I have been hurt badly several times in my life. I have to
remember that I have hurt others at some point as well. We are all human. Forgive those who have done you wrong because they do not deserve to live in your head rent free. Pack their bags and kick them out today. After you do that, be thankful for what you have. Be thankful for your loved ones. Spend some time with them. Do not let the negative people bring you down. You are the only person that can make your life peaceful. If you need to see a counselor to get rid of those negative thoughts, do it. There is no shame in seeing a counselor. That is one of the best decisions I ever made. I am going to repeat myself now. You are the only person that
can make your life peaceful. Nobody can do it for you. There is no amount of money or material possessions that will bring you peace. You have to find peace within yourself.