The Power of Journaling

By: Jason Marcle

Do you often feel like you don’t have anyone to talk to? Don’t have anybody that can understand what you are feeling? Do you ever feel ashamed or embarrassed to talk about certain things with someone else? A journal might help you cope with anxiety. It doesn’t matter if you are male or female, everyone can benefit from journaling. There are many ways you can use a journal and you don’t have to worry about it being right or wrong. You don’t even have to make sense. It is a wonderful tool to use as an emotional awareness exercise.

In my late teenage years, I was experiencing some depression. I was around the age of 16 years old when one of my friends was stabbed and his body thrown over a bridge into a river. A couple of months later, I had a friend flip his truck down from house and he died in the accident. This was a lot for me to process. A week before the murder, my friend was riding the strip with me in my 1989 Pontiac Grand Am. I remember he even popped my trunk and rode back there for a few minutes. A week later, he was gone.

I didn’t know how to process all of this. The only death I had really dealt with at this point was the death of my mother’s father. That is another story. I felt like something had been taken away for no reason. I was sad. I lost my appetite. The murder was a shock. I knew everyone that was involved. I knew the guy that stabbed my friend. I knew the guy that helped him throw the body over the bridge. I knew the 4th party involved that got stabbed and lived.

In a very short time, I lost 35 pounds. My dad sat me down and tried talking to me. He told me of the time when he lost his cousin at a young age. He explained to me how hard it was for him and that I had to move forward. My mother also talked to me and asked me how she could help. She suggested that I keep a journal to write down my feelings. She explained that even if you wadded up the paper and tossed it in the trash can afterwards, it would still help to get my feelings out. These were some great mental health tips and advice.

I had never felt like this. I was having a real hard time processing the loss of these two young men. I carried on for a few more weeks. I eventually lost a total of 55 pounds within a three-month timeframe. Finally, I decided to write my feelings down on paper. Sometimes the things I wrote did not make any sense, but that was ok. I wasn’t turning in an English paper or anything that I was going to be graded on. I was just writing down whatever came to mind. I wrote down memories, what made me mad, sad, or even happy that day. Eventually, I could tell this was helping. It wasn’t going to change past events, it was simply allowing me to voice my feelings with getting embarrassed, without making someone mad, or even hurting someone’s feelings. By getting these feelings off my chest, I was able to socialize with others. I didn’t feel so overwhelmed with grief and anger. I was able to halfway feel normal again, if there is such a thing.

In early sobriety, I again heard several people talk about journaling in their addiction stories. Some were women and some were middle-aged guys just like me. They would talk about writing down daily gratitude lists to show themselves what blessings they really have in their lives. It could even be something small like being thankful for having enough gas to drive to work. They would also perform a personal reflection of the day to make sure they hadn’t hurt anyone or wronged anyone.

If they see they have harmed or wronged someone, they will then make direct amends to that person. Once they started writing out these things daily, they started feeling some real gratitude. They started treating others differently because making amends isn’t very fun.

The first couple of years in sobriety, I kept a journal. I would write down my feelings about certain things that were discussed in our group meetings. I would also write down quotes that others would say that I could identify with. This made me feel like someone understood me. After a couple of years, I fell out of this habit completely due to the COVID pandemic. In-person meetings were temporarily stopped resulting in me getting out of my normal routine.

People struggled with their normal routines during this time as it seemed like the world had turned upside down. I never lost my sobriety from drinking, but I did lose my emotional sobriety. Everyone’s emotional sensitivity was heightened. Everything we knew as normal was now changing. Many worked from home instead of going to the office. Certain businesses were forced to temporarily shut down resulting in many individuals losing their investments. Those severely infected with COVID died alone in isolation rooms with no family to surround them. It was extremely hard on healthcare workers. I say all this to say that it was hard to stay sober during the pandemic. This brought a lot more attention to mental health awareness.

I had lost my dad and my best friend in 2021. My dad had lung cancer, and my best friend Terry had died from COVID. I had a nervous breakdown in January 2022, so I started back journaling. I didn’t know what else to do. I couldn’t talk to anyone about it because I felt alone. My mom wasn’t the same. She was now a widow trying to hide her own sorrow.

Four months after my nervous breakdown, my mother passed away from COVID. I kept journaling and I kept going to counseling. It really helped me get rid of negative thoughts. I could write down anything. Journaling was some of the best advice my mother ever gave me.

None of this may seem like much to you, but it means a lot to me. This whole mental health blog is for you. It is to show others that they aren’t alone in their struggles, that there are others in this world that feel or have felt just like you do. Journaling has helped me get through my thoughts and feelings. Is helped me get rid of very dark and dangerous thoughts. After filling up my 1st journal, since losing both of my parents, I can look back and see how far I have come over the last year. I hope that this mental health blog will help someone coping with anxiety. Together, we all need to break the stigma around mental health.

Please reach out to us if you are ever in need. Don’t let negative thoughts live rent-free in your head, write them down and get rid of them.

Here is link with really good information about journaling and how to start.

15 Benefits of Journaling and Tips for Getting Started (healthline.com)